I don't write a lot on here, I mostly cover the fluff and post pictures. I don't get deep often, maybe I never have, I can't recall. Today though I am losing it and need a place to emotionally dump if you will.
If I see you in real life, no I don't want to talk about it, I want to dump it and forget it thankyouverymuch.
I am SO SO SO SO SO sick of dealing with everything. I do not know how single parents manage it all. I am sick of being the only one to deal with the poop,pee,stubborn children, whiny relatives, dirty house, idiotic ATT people, toilets that don't flush, laundry, grocery shopping, bills, cars, lawn, grouchy teenagers, back to school socials, etc, etc, ad infinitum.
I am losing my mind and frankly it isn't pretty. I need a break. I need a minute to use the bathroom alone, to eat a meal in peace, to run errands, to be a person instead of just being MOOOOMMMMMYYYYYY.
Most days I know we are doing this for a purpose, to get in a better place, I know it's temporary and worth it in the end. But today? I want to whine. I want to scream. Today I want to run away.
So far this week I have had ATT here for 12 hours, and my internet is still dial up slow. I cannot skype with my husband because they can't fix the darn uverse. I have spent no less than 4 hours on the phone with ATT probably more.
Yesterday at 5pm I pulled out all the junk piled everywhere in Peyton's room and told him he wasn't doing anything else until it was clean.... it's STILL not clean. Just how many hours will it take?
I'm potty training Anna, enough said, if you've ever potty trained a child you know.
I've spent almost 5 hours at dance. Many of those hours trying to convince my very stubborn daughter to apologize to her dance teacher for disrupting class, in the end I caved and let her write her teacher a very heartfelt note instead... it said I AM SORRY. Fabulous, her people skills are astounding.
Avery spent almost all of yesterday crying, practically nonstop, for who knows what reason.
You know what I was planning on doing this week? I had planned on scheduling our school so we could start next week, on time. I've scheduled math, for 2 kids. That's it.
So perhaps you'll understand why today after I had spent hours on the phone with a technician I said look, I need to go, I have 6 kids, a home, schooling, and a life I need to get back to. To this the man on the phone said wow, what are you super mom? That poor man is very lucky I did not scream at him like I wanted to. I AM NOT SUPER MOM..... I am a normal tired sick of it all mom, just like any other.
Here's to the end of a bad day.... hoping tomorrow is a much better one.